Boogie On Down
Where were you when Annie's Drunken Christmas went down? Were you across the country and couldn't attend? Are we not close enough that I would feel weird inviting you? Do you not know me?
Lame excuses. You should have shown up anyway. I'd give you a key if you just asked.
Just because we don't actually know each other doesn't mean you shouldn't be able to get wasted and dance the Annie Behrens way!
Here are a few things you could use to get down just like Uncle Annie;
If you plan on being around more than one other human being, I highly recommend my remedy for Not-On- Stage Fright. Maker's Mark is bound to give you a night to forget.
Donuts? At a Christmas party? YES. Here's what you do; 1) Get your friends drunk. 2) Tie strings around each donut. 3) Get your (drunk) friends to try and eat the donut off the string. You'll be friendless by the end of the night, as this is nearly impossible. Please make sure you taunt them about their inability to eat a donut as well as their insecurities regarding their future and the year to come otherwise this game isn't any fun.
Here's a fun one! Make some delicious crock pot hot chocolate. When your guests arrive, tell them you have a great (mandatory) party game! Bobbing for Marshmallows has been a game that my family has been playing for generations. Back in Ireland, in the 1800's I believe, all the O'Connor's in Killarney would plug in their crock pots, melt some chocolate chips and empty bags and bags of Jet Puffed into that electric cauldron, much to the children's anticipation. Once that shit was boiling, you stuff your face right in there to grab as many marshmallows as you can.
Now, Annie, am I supposed to boogie in silence? Oh no, no, no, innocent reader. I've attached below Annie's Drunken Christmas playlist for your swankiest holiday nights.