I’m always pleasantly surprised when I read my ‘Cancer’ horoscope. Why, yes! There is a social event this weekend and that’s right, I don’t want to go. You say I should go? My, now I’m at a crossroads.
I don’t get into the whole “mercury is in my solar asshole” stuff but I do think the horoscope is an interesting and important read, as it contains the most basic advice. I read Man Repeller’s monthly horoscope because their writers consistently write with the reader in mind and they will have a conversation with you through an article (my goal is almost always to do that, other times I just want to yell at you).
Horoscopes are so broad that they will seem to fit into your life regardless of what is actually going on. It’s a beautiful, psychological trick that’s one of the most brilliant efforts in capitalism and mind control. Some could argue that those are one and the same.
For example, in my Man Repeller November horoscope it reads, “You’ll be super creative at work this month. Don’t be shy about voicing your opinion to clients, and since you’ve got the magical syncing up of Saturn and Uranus, break out the whiteboard and prepare for the best brainstorm you’ve had in awhile.”
First of all, I’m syncing up with Uranus.
Second, I should be voicing my opinions to the clients I don’t have. We should allow ourselves to have the “best brainstorm”. Allow yourself the freedom to be creative and explore our imagination.
This has just reiterated advice I've received throughout my creative career. Don't be shy. Be loud and honest. Be seen! When the words are right in front of us, all of a sudden, it clicks. It's there, it's set in stone in the cyber world and now it's in our heads. When something like this grabs our attention and maybe it's something we've been grappling with for some time, it will often start to gnaw at us until we commit to making these positive changes.
In another November horoscope for cancer, November 18th seems to be a popular date. “No matter how much chocolate you eat, partying you do, or people you make out with, a fresh start will arrive around love and creativity on November 18, thanks to the new moon in Scorpio. Scorpio is the sign of death and rebirth; while you Cancers are especially nostalgic, we both know you're feeling ready for a fresh start and new adventures.”
And boy, Annie is ready for a fresh start! Or at least some fresh fruit.
Jordan Fassina, who’s an avid horoscope reader, a Picses and much less skeptic than I, believes there is , “...some comfort [in] spiritual stimulation, in believing the alignment of the planets and the universe has some power over the person you are. It’s that concept of understanding there is a higher power at work - almost like a religion.”
Horoscopes bring attention to things that we let become ordinary and routine while the relationships, friendships, activities, jobs and problems (that we avoid) in our lives need to be examined, our desks need to be cleaned, our work needs to be creative and specific. Horoscopes may not predict the future but they are reminders for things to improve in our lives.
Here’s where Annie has reached the point of the unknown. If I tried to converse with you all about the inner workings of astrology, I would just be embarrassing myself. And as much fun as I have doing that, it wouldn't benefit you. Because I have no clue of anything past the world of horoscopes in that really small section of the newspaper...if you still get the newspaper. Fassina says that astrology “...is so complex, detailed and specific”
There are so many different parts inside and outside of your sign, “Most people believe there is just their single sign, someone asks what sign you are - you, being born say '12th of May' are a Taurus and leave it at that. But that is just one component of your astrological DNA - there is the moon sign responsible for your inner self and emotions, your mercury sign responsible for the way in which you think and communicate, your venus sign responsible for how you handle love and relationships and so on and so forth. They all fit together like a puzzle - complementing or opposing each other and creating the wonderfully complex, colourful and vibrant humans we are. This, I believe.”
There’s another branch of astrology in which crystals are brought into play. I, for one, believe this too but on a psychological level. I think it’s one way to trick your mind into doing positive things. For instance, you buy a crystal to wear around your neck that is supposed to bring you health and wellness. Now, while wearing that necklace, you choose a salad over a donut. Thus, completing a positive behavioral change.
Rather than my psychological take, Fassina takes the more spiritual route, “there’s a belief (quite an old one) that humans are supposed to live in complete harmony with nature, animals, minerals (i.e. crystals) and each other but we lost it as we industrialized and spirituality got pushed far from being a priority. It is, again, an understanding that there is a higher power that operates and there are forces in the universe greater than us. They are ultimately here to benefit us and genuinely love us and want us to do good. Crystals help me believe that. There’s been many a time I’ve gone to a crystal shop, chosen one because I’ve felt drawn to it, read about its properties and it’s been eerily accurate and fitting to the current circumstances of my life. It’s hard for me not believe something else is at work.”
Freewill is an important belief of mine so Jordan and I differ in that respect. I am always one to take responsibility for my shitty decisions. “I don’t know if it’s me being escapist or not claiming responsibility for my shit (Ha ha classic Pisces traits) but there is great comfort in knowing that maybe your faults were predetermined for you the second you came into the world. And your strengths. Your talent. The way you think and what have you.
...I like knowing that maybe people were always destined to be the person they are.”
ANNIE’S NOTE: Jordan, since I’ve met her, has always been one of the most honest voices in my life. I look forward to her opinion on pretty much everything. I wasn’t looking for anyone’s opinion to change my mind but I definitely have a new respect for the work she does to, one; help me write this piece, two; research and truly understand this belief.